Project Alicia : Reflections.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Reflections.

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Health. Family. Love. Clean Air. Beautiful kids. A roof over my head. Cute shoes. What more could a girl ask for?

I have it all. Or so it would seem.

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But I am currently playing a game- a game I don't much like. It is called the waiting game.

Have you ever found yourself in the waiting game? Perhaps you were waiting for a sale? A sun break? A vacation? Maybe a better job? You may be playing the game right this very moment without even realizing it.

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The waiting game is exhausting and all-consuming. I wake up each day and my mind is flooded with thoughts.

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I wonder if this could be the day. The day that I sell my home and get freed from my lot here in Iowa.

I wonder why it has to be so difficult. I wonder what tomorrow holds...

And as the summer days slip away, the reality of the real estate market and our economy set in. My heart yearns for something that I can't have.

We drop the price again and continue to wait.

My existence is plagued with uncertainty. And confusion. Doubts...

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More showings. More life. More waiting.

School starts. And we are still here.

This knowledge is difficult to stomach. My body aches. My heart is heavy.

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With every falling leaf, the chances of selling lessen.

Is it too much to want a decision? Or a sneak peek into the crystal ball of life?

Or more?

These are the thoughts that weigh me down.

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But alas, the waiting game has grown old. I am tired. Tired of waiting on something that may never happen.

Tired of watching life pass me by- while I am busy waiting.

So, I'm trying to embrace the signs of Autumn and remember the simple joys of life so I can break free from this waiting game.

Wish me luck.

27 comments:

  1. I LOVED this post. Your photographs are breathtaking! I totally can relate to this game like I'm sure many else can. I HATE it. I wish you the best!

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  2. Beautiful photos! I feel for you! Prayers that you sell that house soon, but more than that, that you can enjoy where you're at and not worry. I completely understand, I'm right there with you. Not waiting for a house to sell, but waiting for something else. Either way it really stinks!

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  3. I'm so sorry. I know this has weighed heavily on your heart lately. I wish I could help somehow. Just know that I'm sending hugs and I'm here to listen anytime...

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  4. You are beautiful, and those shoes? I need them! I hope your house sells and you can get to where you want to be...where is that, by the way? ; )

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  5. Oh golly, I know that waiting game! Recently I lived a full year of my live waiting...never ever again! I will always make the most of where I am at the moment from now on.

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  6. The waiting game is not fun. There are times when I feel like I'm always waiting for something, unfortunately. Hope things turn around soon.

    Beautiful photos Alicia!

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  7. Good luck! I am all too familiar with the waiting game. Waiting to start a family...waiting to get to the point where I can quit my job and launch full steam ahead into my business...etc. I know where you are. I think this month always leaves me waiting - but mostly, I am where you are. Hoping I can enjoy autumn.

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  8. Beautiful photos and post! Today is the precious present, embrace it until your house sells and you have the answers that you need.

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  9. This is a beautiful post...
    I, too, have played the waiting game. So many times. On so many subjects.
    I wanted a career change SO BADLY. I knew 14 years ago what I wanted to do & where... but I never knew WHEN or HOW. When it FINALLY happened I understood it was the right time THEN & why. ;-) Hang in there. If it was planted within you, it WILL come to pass @ the right time.

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  10. Your blog is gorgeous! Sorry to hear about the waiting game...very difficult indeed. Where are you trying to move to?

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  11. Heartfelt post Alicia. I too hate the waiting game, having done it already earlier this year when waiting on news of our move from Germany to the U.S. and then again for finding an apartment to live in once we arrived. There's no two ways about it, it sucks and you just have to appreciate the little things that keep you going. Much love xx

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  12. Thinking of you. I would be so anxious in your situation. I hate the waiting game. :(
    Love the pics you posted here. did you take them yourself, or did someone snap them for you?

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  13. Good luck with the sale of your home! I know the waiting game very well! It seems like I'm always waiting for something. Currently it seems to be the next milestone for my toddler!

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  14. I love your photos! I hope and pray your house sells soon.

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  15. wow what a post.thanks for sharing, as I am in thje same situation house related right now. the worry, oh the worry.but we know things will work out.I fell they will soon.Take care Alicia, and wonderful photos!

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  16. The waiting game can be all-consuming...I feel your pain.
    Your pictures are so beautiful though!! I love coming to your blog, it's very inspiring. :)

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  17. Oh Alicia- I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. My heart is heavy for you as I know what you are feeling. We too so desperately want to get out of this place we are in. Only it's not the house that is holding us here- it's the job. A job that I used to think brought security to our family, but with the current state of affairs, is now so uncertain & in constant turmoil. I too feel so trapped & shackled down by things that are so far out of my control. I have to keep telling myself that the Lord has us here for a reason. He's teaching us something- something that will be vital knowledge for us to use in the future. He's holding us here while he lays the path for something better than we could imagine. Something we don't even know we want yet. This has happened to us many times before- where we sat & asked "why is this happening, why are we here going through this". It's not long after when things change & we look back & it's crystal clear why those things happened. Everything has it's time- and it certainly (and much as we find it unfortunate) isn't on OUR time table. It's on his.

    The shoulder is here for you- whenever you need it! Praying for you & your family.

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  18. As always I adore your photos. Being out of control is so very hard. & I'm hoping for the very best for you!

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  19. These photos are stunning!
    I played the same waiting game last year for 8 months, we were desperate to get away from our awful neighbours and just kept dropping the price. In the end we had to take a big drop from what we originally were asking just to get away from there and now we're stuck renting til we can save up what we lost in the sale to buy again :/ But I can't complain too much, I love where we are now, we're walking distance from my parents and the beach and we'll be able to take the time to find our dream home :) Best of luck to you xx

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  20. That is a most beautiful visual representation of waiting! :> I have family that put there place on the market months ago and have only had one showing. It's not pretty and they already know where they are going, but in the meantime, it's that waiting game. I suppose it's what we do while we're waiting that decides how we all deal with it. Though, I'm sure it isn't easy! :>

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  21. You might be waiting, but at least you have super cute shoes! I'd wait in those shoes :) Good luck!!

    WM

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  22. These are A-mazing. You are absolutely gorgeous, & I want to steal your shoes!! Lol.

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  23. hugs lish! hope your house will sell quickly!! xoxo

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  24. Your writing is as engaging as your photography. Readers can feel the traing of having to wait. Not easy. We're doing it, too, but not as intensely.

    God bless.

    And, I've got two of your photos posted here: http://warrenbaldwin.blogspot.com/2011/08/human-stain.html

    Thanks.
    wb

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  25. Sorry, that was supposed to say "strain" of waiting. Don't know where "traing" came from :)

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  26. Gosh you are gorgeous. I pray that you all sell soon. We are just starting our waiting game. Right now I am waiting to get the house ready to sell, then we will be waiting to see if it will even sell. We want to move for Carsyn's sake but it is all a waiting game. Praying for you.

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  27. WOW these are some really great selfies!!!
    At least you are waiting in style!! LOL
    Hoping your waiting endss soon. I know the selling of a house can be long and drawn out. Heres to hoping it moves alot quicker!

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